I sometimes hear from wives who are experiencing very conflicting emotions as it relates to their husband, who had filed for divorce and then changed his mind. On the one hand, they are grateful that he has changed his mind. Because often, they didn’t want a divorce and could only watch helplessly as he filed. But, as grateful and as relieved as they are, they are often left wondering what reasons lead to his change of heart.
I heard from a wife who said: “after months of fighting and even a short separation, my husband filed for divorce four weeks ago. I did everything I could to delay him or talk him out of this, including offering counseling and compromises. Nothing worked. When he filed, I was devastated and I grieved. I was so sorry for my kids and for the future that I wouldn’t have. Within the last week, I have sort of accepted it. I’m not saying that I’m not still devastated but I realized that there wasn’t a whole lot that I could do about it. And wouldn’t you know as soon as I had started to accept it my husband came by and told me that, for now, he has changed his mind about the divorce. The first thing out of my mouth was to ask why. And the reason is that I had thrown every argument that I had at him to get him to change his mind and now, he has changed his mind all on his own. He won’t give me a straight answer as to what brought this on. And, as a result, I don’t trust it. I think he probably decided that a divorce was going to cost him too much money in child support. Because why else would he change his mind like this?”
There are multiple reasons that a man might change his mind about a divorce. And only a few of them have to do with the cost of a divorce. I will discuss some of the possibilities in the following article.
He May Have Simply Had A Change Of Heart: This is difficult for many wives to believe. But as soon as he realizes that this might actually be real, that in a few short weeks he will no longer be living with you or his children, he can have some sobering doubts about whether the divorce is the right call. Also, sometimes men who are considering or who have filed for divorce interact with men who are already divorced. They might notice that the divorced men don’t really seem all that happy and may even seem downright lonely. Many men in this situation have admitted to me that they went to one of their divorced friends thinking that this friend was going to tell them how wonderful the newly single life is, only to discover that instead the friend expressed how much he regrets no longer being married.
Also, men can also begin to think back …